Bitch? Why you mad ?

Cause, My Pussy Pops Severly

And, yours don’t ?

mormondad:

real life high school advice:

  • dont slack 
  • be friends with everyone 
  • kiss ass like there is no tomorrow

dicksplit:

World without pussy:

image

World without dick:

image

I want Starbucks

venera9:

If you don’t think that the ARTPOP album cover is the tightest shit ever, get outta my goddamn face.

katbot:

Professor: Your essay must be 3,000 - 6,000 words

Me: image

nowyoukno:

More facts at NowYouKno.com and don’t forget to Follow NowYouKno for more like this on your dash!

lilbuttmonkey:

dontneedfeminism:

killedmycatatemytailor:

xsongmihix:

cadyanne94:

Dedicated to all my fellow retail employees

All of these are oh so painfully true.

I used to work at McDonalds and literally every single one of them has happened to me. Ergh.

Price tag: “2 for $3”
Customer: “so can I get 1 for $1.50?”

3 for 2 does not mean you get THREE items for TWO pounds ¬_¬

lanashiftdelrey:

coming out of your room at 3 am and seeing your parents

image

c